The disconnect some mothers feel after a Caesarean Surgery

By Lee-Anne Price, Kids in Perth Contributor 03 Nov 2021

caesarean

From start to finish, getting pregnant, being pregnant and giving birth can cause apprehension and unease along with the resounding happiness parenthood brings. Something that can happen, be it rare, is the disconnection and maternal alienation some mothers feel towards their babies after a scheduled or emergency caesarean surgery (Journal of Health Psychology, 2009).

The feeling goes against everything you thought should be happening and are told by health professional, friends and family that an immediate and all-consuming love will wash over you, when the reality is sometimes the opposite. The notion that you don’t feel immediate love for a child you created over 9 months can be heartbreaking and isolating for new mothers as well as the new role of being a new parent. 

Young woman holding newborn baby

A caesarean surgery can cause an emotional disconnect when you don’t get the immediate contact with baby or skin to skin contact in the “golden hour” after birth (Lutz, Monica Anne, 2013), the child is born early, no oxytocin surge or love hormone or emergency surgery foiling your plans for the perfect birth as general anesthesia can also be associated with impaired mother infant bonding (Journal of Perinatal Medicine, 2019).

As a new time mother, you’re looking for the natural response to seeing your baby and when you don’t get this, feelings of shame, failure and sadness creep in as a result. Time heals all wounds as the saying goes, and slowly but surely the feelings you were looking for on day one of motherhood can be found and will grow.

Feeling disconnected to your child after major surgery is not a failure but a natural response to the modern-day pregnancy and birth of babies.

Support | find help here.

Closeup of woman belly with a scar from a cesarean section. Woman with baby on her hand

If the birth and pregnancy of your child doesn’t live up to the expectations in your head, then just know there are many other women going through the exact same thing and you are not alone in these feeling and your experiences and emotions are valid. The effects of a caesarean surgery are endless, but with constant support from family, friends and healthcare services, communication and education you will at least have better insight into the emotions that sometimes come with the surgery.

If you or someone you know can relate to this feeling, we’ve found the following support services that might help.

 

Share your story.

Have you got a similar story or advice for other parents going through something similar?

Contribute to this article by sharing your experience in the comments section below.

Share This! Share this content on your Socials

Related Articles

(l to r) Mrs. Primm (Constance Wu), Josh Primm (Winslow Fegley), Lyle (Lyle the Crocodile) and Hector (Javier Bardem) slurp up an ice cream sundae in Columbia Pictures LYLE, LYLE, CROCODILE.  Photo by: Courtesy of Sony Pictures

The whole family will sing along with this crocodile!

Meerilinga Training College -25112022 - img2

Five reasons to study Early Childhood Education and Care with Meerilinga

Bayswater Skate Park Opening CREDIT - METRONET

Skater boys and girls, check out WA’s newest and biggest vert ramp!

Self-portrait of nice attractive idyllic sweet kind careful adorable cheerful cheery, dreamy big full foster family celebrating spending newyear time eve noel day light white interior living-room

Kids In Perth’s 2022 Christmas Guide

Leave a Comment