Meet Nicole Koelewijn, Perth’s Relationship Coach
By Marnie Adams, Contributor @ Kids In Perth | Created in collaboration with Nicole Koelewijn Relationship Coach 26 Dec 2022
Photo Credit: Nicole Koelewijn
Hi fellow parents,
I'm Nicole, a Perth relationship coach, supporting couples to get the most out of their relationships.
Being a mother of two, I recognise the transition to parenthood, or anytime during parenthood for that matter, as a time in life when you can get lost as partners.
Naturally, with so much time and focus placed on children and family, the relationship dynamic you have once had or desire can feel as unattainable as that elusive sleep-in.
My personal mission is to break down outdated stigmas of couples only seeking support once the relationship is on its last legs.
Photo Credit: Nicole Koelewijn
I’m passionate about providing couples with the framework and support to get the most out of their relationships. Whether it’s improving existing communication patterns so it can thrive at a deeper level or moving through conflict in ways that feel as if you're “on each other's team”.
While working as a mediator and coach to help resolve conflict in work settings, I couldn't stop thinking about how powerful these techniques would be if they were applied in our personal relationships. Not just to work through conflict, but also, to help people get the best out of their relationships in proactive ways that align with life and family goals, needs and dreams.
Couples who typically collaborate with me want to be together, deeply love each other and, most importantly, recognise things can be better. They want to consciously work through a difficult time as a united front and create a partnership that will allow them to get the most out of each other and life.
Finding out more about how coaching can support you at various stages of your relationship by visiting my website or getting in touch with me directly from this article.
- Nicole Koelewijn, Relationship Coach
Photo Credit: Nicole Koelewijn
Interested in finding out more about how coaching can support you at various stages of your relationship?
Visit nicolekoelewijncoach.com or learn more below
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Learn More | Relationship Advice
Nicole Woelewijn, Perth's Relationship Coach shares her Top 10 Relationship Tips.
Relationship Tip #1 | Relationship life phases
Relationships go through life phases which means they will change and this is normal.
Relationship Tip #2 | Conflict isn't always bad
Conflict is not necessarily a red flag. Some conflict is normal and constructive in healthy relationships, ultimately it means you care!
Relationship Tip #3 | Daytime dates
For tired parents, try organising a daytime rather than an evening date. You'll notice a change in the energy and depth of the conversation you have.
Relationship Tip #4 | Common cause for arguments
Arguments stem from uncommunicated expectations that aren't met. So communicate these if you sense a discrepancy.
Relationship Tip #5 | Small and frequent
Small, frequent acts of love can go further than grand yet infrequent gestures.
Relationship Tip #6 | Stay curious
Always remain curious about your partner's inner world and ask questions. Even when you've been together for a long time, you can never know everything.
Relationship Tip #7 | Regular relationship check-ins
Schedule regular (every 3 or 6 months) relationship check-ins where you can have bigger conversations about how you feel you're going as a couple, any other life stressors and any desired changes for the future.
Relationship Tip #8 | Focus on Impact not behaviour
When communicating a hard message, focus on the impact it's had on you rather than making assumptions about what the other person meant by their behaviour.
Relationship Tip #9 | Don't be absolutist
Avoid speaking in absolutist terms such as “you always” or “you never” when raising a complaint with your partner. Be specific about the behaviour you're referring to by providing a recent example where possible.
Relationship Tip #10 | Don't compare
Try not to compare your relationship with others, it's irrelevant and there's no way you can know the full picture of what's going on in the inner world of other couples.
Social Feed | Engage with Nicole
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Learn More | Relationship Coaching 101
Great relationships are eternally in the process of creation and evolution.
Behind each one is a great deal of curiosity about each other’s inner worlds and the willingness to have challenging conversations.
What is Relationship Coaching?
What does it look like?
Support to have the conversations you need to have but can’t seem to.
In Nicole's work, she draws from the modalities of coaching, mediation and psychology to support individuals and couples to understand their current situation at a deeper level and move towards creative, empowered and future-focused options moving forward.
Nicole creates an environment where couples feel equally safe, heard and seen.
Get deep, feel challenged and uncomfortable but also have a lot of fun in the process.
Write your future story, together and intentionally.
Who benefits from Coaching for Couples?
Coaching for Couples is for you if:
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You have high expectations for how you want to experience your relationship.
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You don’t want to waste time or energy perpetuating the same patterns or dynamics.
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You or your partner feel the lack the tools or space to have deeper conversations in a constructive way during the course of everyday life.
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You’re looking for a safe space to discuss where you’re at and where you want to be in terms of communication, intimacy or how to better manage conflict as a couple.
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You’re looking for independent support so you don’t extend “drama” into other relationships or areas of your life by involving friends or family.
How does it work?
Step 1.
Get in Touch with Nicole using the form below or visiting her website to send an email letting her know a bit more about you and your situation.
Nicole will be in touch to set up a free 15-minute phone or Zoom call where you're able to clear up any questions you may have and, in general, get a feel for each other.
Step 2.
If everyone feels comfortable together, you're then going to choose how many sessions you wish to book with the first session scheduled during this step.
Sessions are 1-on-2, jointly with you and your partner and 90 minutes long.
Both options include tailored “homework” and resources following sessions for you to get the most out of the experience.
Step 3.
Nicole will love to hear feedback at the end of every session.
Also, Nicole will continue to be a resource for you at any point in your relationship journey after your time together.
FAQs
How many sessions to sign up for?
This largely depends on your needs, goals and desires.
Typically, the longer you engage with coaching, the more likely it is you’ll get to the heart of the issue and changes will stick. Nicole recommends three sessions as a minimum to give yourselves the time to properly engage with the coaching process.
If you wish to explore a different arrangement, this is something to discuss together with Nicole.
Does our relationship need to be in trouble to get value from coaching?
Absolutely not.
While a bumpy patch is a natural time to connect and reflect on your relationship, you certainly don’t need to wait until this point.
You can always consciously shine a light while you’re in a good place.
Relationship coaching can help couples set goals, map out solutions to potential issues ahead of time and have important discussions about how you want your life together to be.
It’s definitely not all about navigating conflict.
How much is the investment?
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For 3 x 90 min coaching sessions (4.5 hours of coaching), your investment is AU $997.
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For 4 x 90 min coaching sessions (6 hours of coaching), your investment is $1,159.
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For 5 x 90 min coaching sessions (7.5 hours of coaching), your investment is AU $1,429.
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Further sessions are $280 per 90-minute session.
Are coaching sessions held in person or online?
Depending on your preference and what works with your lifestyle.
Sessions can be held either online over Zoom or in person at Nicole's space in Subiaco.
What is the difference between coaching and therapy?
Biggest difference between coaching and therapy is that as a coach, Nicole does not assess, diagnose or treat mental illness.
Coaching has been described as having a future orientation in contrast to therapy which can involve a deep exploration into past or childhood trauma.
The coaching process is focused on encouraging self-reflection and inspiring action.
Relationship Resources
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Contact | Make Enquiry
Looking to introduce coaching into your relationship or have questions? How about receiving helpful relationship advice?
Get in touch directly with Nicole Koelewijn or sign up for her newsletter by submitting a form below.
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